Monday, February 17, 2014

A "Jaw" Breaker

A large cougar clawed this truck’s cab, or so it seems. It’s just a fancy paint job, of course. That big rig spilled no blue blood. The real damage was done in the accompanying blurb about the patriarch of Hollywood blue bloods.

When Dodie, my “West Coast mom,” saw this teaser about Will Smith on AOL’s home page, she dropped me a text because the teaser contained a jaw-dropping sentence — literally. Thank you, Dodie! (Smith’s mobile home — a trailer Hitch? — may be a long-lost cousin of Optimus Prime or Megatron. With the touch of a button it transforms, as the Celebrity Motor Homes video states, “into an amazing double-decker mansion on wheels.” The passenger side expands like a DVD slot, and the roof rises more than 3 feet, revealing a home away from home with a private lounge, wardrobe room and 14 (!) televisions. You can check out the video here.)

The draw of the AOL teaser comes near the end. I’d like to draw your attention to the second-to-last white word, which reveals an open-and-shut case of misuse.

All sorts of things drop: Bombs. Prices. Temperatures. Sea levels. Curtains. Large crystal balls in Times Square. New albums. And drawers, if you’re at the proctologist’s office.

Jaws drop too. Jaws. Not draws. That’s why a group of friends and I have decided to remove this trailer trash. Orthognathic surgery isn’t required, which means we don’t need a dr. The j crew and I will do all the work. We’ll put jaw back, eliminating this drawback.

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