A Fine Line

When reading the newspaper, I save the best — the sports section — for last. And the last page I look at is the agate page. For those who aren’t familiar with the term, the agate page is the one chock full of sports minutia: league standings, box scores, transactions, TV listings, point spreads and so forth.

I spend a lot of time looking at the agate page. Too much, probably.

While looking over the fine print of this particular agate page with a fine-tooth comb, I found something that is not fine with me. In fact, it’s for the (flightless) birds.

The black-and-white issue is as follows: The person who wrote these NHL transactions laid an egg by having “has been fined” waddle its way into our lives. This smirch of the Penguins’ Jordan Staal must stop, so let’s fine-tune this transaction. Here goes:

NHL – Fined Pittsburgh Penguins F Jordan Staal $2,500.

Ah, much better. We’ve finessed our way through this fine mess. What a difference a fine adjustment can make.

Have a fine day, readers!