Jennifer Love Hewitt

A date

A fancy restaurant

Whenever she wants

I'm a nice guy

What's a synonym for synonym?
Look it up in a thesaurus

Why is the "Rock-a-bye Baby" nursery rhyme suitable for children?
Because, despite its lyrics about infants falling from trees, it has a soothing melody

Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?
For the same reason we have shipments in cars and cargo in ships

Why do we wear a pair of pants?
To cover our pair of underwear

Why is the person who invests your money called a broker?
To give you fair warning

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of congress?
Progress, of course

Why do Bruce Banner's pants stay on when he changes into the Hulk?
A super-strong elastic waistband

Why does Evian backward spell naive?
Truth in advertising

Why can't we sneeze with our eyes open?
We can. Try it.

What's up?
Gas prices, my blood pressure and gang-related shootings, among other things

Who's on first?
Certainly not Alex Rodriguez

Where's the beef?
On Dave Thomas Boulevard in Dublin, Ohio

To be or not to be?
Depends on the situation

Do I look fat?
Oh, certainly not! No, no, no! No way. Uh-uh.

What time is it?
Ask me again later

Who let the dogs out?
The same guy who let the cat out of the bag

Why do some words have silent letters?
Igt makres itl eastier tvo pronoudnce tjhem

Why can nobody tell Clark Kent is Superman?
Maybe they need glasses

Why is six afraid of seven?
Because seven ate nine