Who?
Jennifer Love Hewitt
What?
A date
Where?
A fancy restaurant
When?
Whenever she wants
Why?
I'm a nice guy
What's a synonym for synonym?
Look it up in a thesaurus
Why is the "Rock-a-bye Baby" nursery rhyme suitable for children?
Because, despite its lyrics about infants falling from trees, it has a soothing melody
Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?
For the same reason we have shipments in cars and cargo in ships
Why do we wear a pair of pants?
To cover our pair of underwear
Why is the person who invests your money called a broker?
To give you fair warning
If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of congress?
Progress, of course
Why do Bruce Banner's pants stay on when he changes into the Hulk?
A super-strong elastic waistband
Why does Evian backward spell naive?
Truth in advertising
Why can't we sneeze with our eyes open?
We can. Try it.
What's up?
Gas prices, my blood pressure and gang-related shootings, among other things
Who's on first?
Certainly not Alex Rodriguez
Where's the beef?
On Dave Thomas Boulevard in Dublin, Ohio
To be or not to be?
Depends on the situation
Do I look fat?
Oh, certainly not! No, no, no! No way. Uh-uh.
What time is it?
Ask me again later
Who let the dogs out?
The same guy who let the cat out of the bag
Why do some words have silent letters?
Igt makres itl eastier tvo pronoudnce tjhem
Why can nobody tell Clark Kent is Superman?
Maybe they need glasses
Why is six afraid of seven?
Because seven ate nine