Thursday, August 9, 2012

Have a Whale of a Time, Bro


Turns out, 15 years ago the Hartford Whalers blazed a trail that you're just now following. Today it's your turn to put Connecticut in the rearview mirror and head south, to the Carolinas.

Today, the trip begins. An 850-mile trip, measured truly, though we know it's been a much longer journey than that. One, I hope, that leads you to immeasurable happiness.

You won't have to dress like this any longer. Lucky you!
You did it. You got the job you wanted, at the company you wanted. The ride's been bumpy at times, but you kept your head up, maintained your balance, reached for and grabbed that brass ring. Don't let it go. Hold onto it. Polish it from time to time. Make it shine. Shine on, bro!

I hope you're excited. I'm excited for you.

I hope you're proud. I'm proud of you.

You've made headway, going from feeling blue in a blue state to prepping for red-letter days in a red state. I'm green with envy.

Speaking of green, may the grass be greener where the Palmettos grow. It should be — the sun shines brighter and hotter there than it does here in cold, gray Connecticut.

If an omnipotent being had knocked on my door yesterday and offered me one of the following, which do you think I would have chosen?

a. Jennifer Love Hewitt
b. A happy, fulfilled brother with an overwhelming joie de vivre
c. A first-ever College World Series title for a certain orange-and-blue university

The answer, a no-brainer, can be found in this clip:

It's difficult to see you go, though I know it's for the best. It may seem like a strange cup of tea, but if it's what's right for you, then it's all right with me. Of course, I'll miss you the way Andre Drummond misses free throws. Yes, that terribly.

I wish you nothing but the best, bro. You deserve to have fortune and fate smile upon you. It's your time.

If you ever need me, you call me ... maybe. Sorry. I had Carly Rae Jepsen (and your long-ago encounter with Big Dave) on the brain.

It's time to let you go. One last hug before I bid you adieu:

Give my best to the Ol' Ball Coach.


Note to readers: Yes, I know this post has nothing to do with editing. My blog, my rules!


  1. It may not but it was a great one to read. People's dreams come true at different times...

    1. Thanks for the kind words, Chas. I hope with all my heart that the time is now — I mean NOW! — for Paul’s dreams to become reality.

  2. Thanks for making me laugh and cry in the same reading. I have THE GREATEST BROTHER in the world. There is no argument. That. Is. All.

    1. I’d normally deduct editing points for the use of all caps and the employment of sentence fragments. I’ll let it slide — this time. P.S. If I were the greatest brother in the world, wouldn’t I own a mug denoting such an honor? This isn’t some unofficial, arbitrary ranking, is it? I’m the greatest, right? Right?